Reflecting Back

Reconnecting with my younger self has always been both a little difficult for me and exciting! I love looking at past photos and digging into the places in my mind to try and re-encounter those memories. But, it also tends to bring up some past trauma I obviously haven't fully dealt with in depth. Most times I find myself getting lost for hours at a time revisiting childhood pictures of myself and even family. When I was younger I would find myself going through our many photo albums, more than 4 times a year. It's something about the photos for me, the nostalgia of it all. Being able to think back to happier times, all while seeing the growth of how far you've come. I love every second of it. But, like I said before it’s still hard for me most times, triggering you might say. I'm not surprised at all by the mental blocks I have placed on myself. I feel as though I did it to protect myself, from all the overwhelming emotions it brought me. It did surprise me at how many I had placed in my mind however. I have so many mental blocks placed, especially throughout highschool. High School was probably some of the worst times in my life. I know for sure there are so many things I can’t even recall from all the suppressing I've done regarding it. That’s also how I feel about my early childhood stages as well. Especially from ages five to eight, honestly even typing about it at this moment makes me a little sick. Those were some rough times for me as well. Looking at those pictures makes me think about who I would be if I hadn't gone through what I did at that age. Which I also know is hard to wrap your mind around, because God always has a plan. But, there's always that little voice in the back of your head that's like, “why me?” I can honestly say, I have had so many, “Why me’s” over the years. It's hard to understand, especially as a child why these things are happening to you. Trust me I know, God is going to use these things as a testimony to help others. He never said it would be easy however, and it has not been easy. Although I talked about how difficult it was to revisit the pictures, it was also very fun. I love laughing at myself, and seeing how much I've grown as a person. Both, physically and mentally, especially in these past couple years. It's crazy to think how different of a person I am from a couple years ago, even last year. But, I feel like that's the best part about an assignment like this one. Seeing the growth in yourself. Sometimes we have to see where we came from to notice how far we have come. It really put things in perspective for me. It makes me feel like if I can survive everything i've already been through, I know I can't stop now!

Using this technique for a guidance lesson I feel would be a little challenging. Especially if there has been past trauma associated with the pictures. I will say however it could be used as a way for them to introduce themselves and get to know who they are. This also could be used as a gratitude lesson. Giving thanks for the small things that have transpired in their lives so far. Taking each picture and remembering a happy time from each stage of life. This could initially put them in a place of gratitude and be thankful for the things they have experienced and overcame! In the future I feel like I would use this for a growth exercise. My plan would be to let them collect pictures of themselves up until where they are right now. Looking back over their life, we could discuss what they knew and what they thought they knew about themselves and the world around them. Then once all that is over we discuss why growth is a good thing. Also to show them how much they have grown physically and mentally. Then I would switch the topic over a little bit to looking towards the future setting. Things such as, where do we grow from here? Setting goals, expectations for self, things they want to do, to get them thinking about future endeavors. This will also get them thinking about the type of person they want to be. This could even open up their mind to how their past selves have shaped who they are today, and how they can grow from that as well. This is how I would use it as a guidance lesson.